The 4th trimester is something I didn’t prepare for or even know about when I had Quinn. Essentially the 4th trimester is the 12-week period immediately after you have had your baby. It is a time of serious physical and emotional change as your baby adjusts to being outside the womb, and you adjust to your new with your baby.
This is often the time when baby blues or PP anxiety and depression can arise. I knew about this part, but it wasn’t necessarily something I was prepared for. With your first baby, I think you’re so focused on making sure you have everything you need (and more!) for the baby and there is so little focus on how you plan to take care of yourself afterwards. I’ve been pretty open about my postpartum anxiety and depression with Quinn (I wrote about it here).
This time around, I’m going into it with a different mindset. I know myself and how I handle lack of sleep and the unpredictability of a newborn. I know I’ll be anxious at times (esp. at night), but luckily this time I DO know it will not last forever. Here are some steps I’m taking and preparing for to hopefully have a smoother 4th trimester.
Medications/supplements/labs: When prepping to get pregnant with Quinn I went off my birth control and anti-anxiety medication a few months before conceiving. It wasn’t until about 6 months PP that I finally realized I needed to get back on the anxiety medication to help with my postpartum anxiety and depression. When having trouble getting pregnant this time around I decided to try getting off the medication again to see if that would help. I noticed my anxiety starting to creep back in when we got Daisy as she was up a lot a night, so I took that as my cue to talk to my doctor and get started back on my medication before baby. I also will be starting this postnatal multivitamin and continue to take my Omega’s, Vitamin D, probiotic, liquid collagen, Vital Proteins, and magnesium. I’m hopeful being on top of all of these supplements this time around will help.
Lastly, I got in touch with my naturopath and we plan to meet after my 6 week postpartum checkpoint and recheck all my hormone labs and adjust my supplements/medications as needed.
Ask for help/accept help: When I had Quinn we were in the middle of moving from CA to Seattle. It was a total mess and I didn’t have much of a support system in Seattle when we got to Seattle (Quinn was 4 months old). I now have a great group of friends (and some family) and I’m hopeful I will feel so much more settled, grounded, and less isolated this time around.
I’ve already had friends offer to help take/pick up Quinn for camps and playdates and I plan to willingly accept the help. In the past I might have said no and tried to do it all myself, but I know I can’t and will be much more willing to accept help this time around. Asking for and accepting help is really hard to do, but necessary because it really does take a village.
Mute/unfollow Instagram accounts: I follow a lot of mamas on insta and sometimes that can be really helpful to get tips and tricks and not feel alone, but there can be times it makes me feel bad and anxious. I think most of us can relate to this love/hate relationship with social media, right? While it’s not realistic to say I won’t be on social media with a newborn because let’s face it…what the heck else are you doing while nursing at all hours of the day and night? I plan to follow accounts that make me feel good and mute/unfollow those that are not as this time in my life.
Stocked kitchen/fridge: I am starting to make a bunch of lactation goodies and other snack items to have stocked in the freezer ready to go. I wrote a post here with all the recipes I’m making. I also have a monthly order for Daily Harvest smoothies and bowls to be delivered for quick and nutritious meals.
Manage Expectations: I already know that I don’t handle the newborn life well. The anxiety of the unknown wake-ups, unpredictable schedule (I’m very type A), and lack of sleep are tough for me. Having already been through it before, I’m hopeful I can remind myself it’s all temporary and I will sleep again! I hope to be kind and patient with myself and the season will will be in and just accept it rather than trying to fix or control it too much. Easier said than done 😉
Talk to friends and family: Lastly, I plan to be open and honest with friends and family about how I’m doing. This ties into the asking for help, but acknowledging if I’m having a hard time and being able to get support from those close to me is really important.
xx, A