If you’ve been following along for a while then you know I was always on the fence about having a second baby. Even when I was pregnant with Quinn I told people she might be my one and only. I truly thought we were one and done until Quinn turned 3. The summer she turned 3 was when I really started to get that desire to have another baby and I wanted to give Quinn a sibling. As many of you know it took us a while to get pregnant with baby #2 and for a while there I really didn’t think it was in the cards for us.
Now that I’m 24 weeks pregnant it’s starting to feel really REAL that there will be a new baby in our life in a short 3 months. While this is what I wanted, and tried so hard for, I would be lying if I said I wasn’t scared and nervous about it. I have a history of postpartum depression and anxiety (I wrote about that here) and I am prepared to be managing that again this time around. I actually went ahead and spoke with my doctor and got started on anti-anxiety medication now instead of waiting until once baby comes. Even though I’ve done the newborn thing before, it feels like ages ago. I feel like I’ve forgotten everything and I’m already feeling anxious about what it will all look like.
With Quinn being almost 5 when baby girl comes, I’m so hopeful the big age gap will be in my advantage (major major props to mamas to have back to back babies!!) She’s excited to be a big sister and I’m hopeful she will be an amazing little helper. However, we are going through a really rough time with Quinn right now. She just turned 4.5, so I don’t know if this is a 6 month leap or what, but she has been TOUGH at home. Luckily she’s an angel at school and for others, but at home girlfriend is tough.
She has started having a really hard time getting dressed in the morning (trust me I’ve tried every tactic to make this run smoothly) and is just wanting to stay in PJs all day. Lots of whining, complaining, crying, etc. in the mornings trying to get her dressed and out the door. We also have similar issues at night with the bed time routine we’ve been doing for years…shower, brush teeth, potty, book, bed takes FOREVER with non stop whining, negotiating, and tears (for everyone).
Needless to say we are exhausted and really unsure how to best navigate this tricky time with her. This is clearly giving me even more anxiety about what the transition to baby #2 will look like, in that I won’t have an hour to help her get dressed in the mornings or have the energy to negotiate non-stop with her to do simple tasks to make the day run smoothly.
I’ll share a quick story of where we are at….my husband takes Quinn skiing on Sundays. This weekend he drove her all the way to the mountain where she refused to get out of the car and get dressed into her ski clothes. He ended up driving her home- no skiing. I was almost in tears and anxiety through the roof about how it’s gotten to this point she wouldn’t even get dressed to ski which she loves to do.
Anyways, I’m just trying to keep it real on here and share our current struggles and stressors in hopes that someone else doesn’t feel alone in theirs. Parenting and kids are really tough and tricky and while I’m so excited to meet baby girl in June and know she will be so much joy to our lives, I’m currently feeling a bit overwhelmed with everything on our plate at the moment (cough cough…I’m talking about you too Daisy).
In the meantime I’m doing my best to manage my anxiety by taking care of myself. I take this magnesium supplement at night to help me relax, epsom salt baths, continue to make exercise/movement a priority, reading at night instead of scrolling Insta, and expressing my feelings with friends and family for support.
Thanks for listening to my brain dump today!
xx, A
