I wrote a post back in February about how I was feeling about the transition from 1 to 2 kids and it’s funny to look back on that now. Honestly, the transition for me has gone a lot better than I expected. Don’t get me wrong, it’s pure chaos trying to manage Quinn, Daisy (now 8 months and getting much better!), and now adding Kinsley into the mix. Mentally and emotionally I’m feeling so much stronger and more confident with a newborn this time around which I think has really helped me with the transition.
When we brought Quinn home, we had absolutely no idea what we were doing (as most new parents don’t) and it was completely overwhelming for me. Adjusting to the lack of sleep and figuring out how to take care of a newborn (especially a fussy one) was really hard for me. I coped as best as I could, but in hindsight I was a train wreck. This time around, both my husband and I are much more calm (well he’s always calm I’m the psycho) and confident in knowing what we are doing.
A common question we get is how Quinn is handling the transition. No matter how much we tried to prepare her and talk about it, I don’t think she fully understood what was happening until we brought Kinsley home (which is understandable). I think she also thought we were bringing home a 2 year old playmate and she’s somewhat underwhelmed by Kinsley at times. I think Quinn being almost 5 has made this transition both easier and harder in ways. Since she is older, she is very self sufficient. She does not require 24/7 eyes on her, can play by herself, get herself dressed and ready (although we still have challenges with this) and can be a helper with the baby. She is old enough to be in camps this summer and is starting kindergarten in the fall (praise!) The challenge is that she has been an only child for almost 5 years and this rocked her world a bit. She has her hard moments and days, but overall I think she’s so proud and happy to be a big sister.
We are going on 2 months of this new normal and Quinn has come a long way in getting to know Kinsley and her routine. She likes picking out outfits for Kinsley, making her a tummy time/floor playing area, talking to her, and dancing for her. Kinsley already lights up and smiles when Quinn is around her.
My husband is still working from home and that has been such a huge help. He is able to offer me extra hands throughout the day if needed, he helps with drop off/pick-ups with Quinn, and is mostly on Quinn bedtime duty in the evenings. It’s also nice just having another person in the house…it makes it feel less isolating not being home alone (even though he’s in the basement). He also take Daisy on walks during the day so she is getting exercised and is calm (well…calmer lol).
Kinsley is taking a bottle like a champ and I’m pumping about 4-5 times a day, so that is giving me some freedom and flexibility to leave the house without her if I need to. I’ve started trying to have more 1:1 time with Quinn to continue to make her feel special. Last weekend we went to get our nails done and grab a Starbucks which is something we used to do together often pre-Kins. We are currently gearing up for her 5th birthday party and although throwing and hosting a party sounds exhausting right now, I don’t want to short change her this year. So a rainbow themed birthday party is on the agenda next weekend!
There is no way around it though…2 kids is a lot harder and busier than 1 kid (and I can’t imagine more than 2 kids…HEATHER!) I now realize how calm and quiet our household was before and how much free time I had. I honestly do miss that. I’m a hot mess these days and usually unsure if I’ve brushed my hair, teeth, or showered. This time around though I do know this is a short phase and we will get into more of a routine as Kinsley gets older. Right now every day if different, chaotic, and messy, but I’m choosing to roll with it and not let myself worked up if things don’t look perfect.
xx, A
